Round 8 is behind me, and it went as smoothly as we’d hoped. The day was pretty routine overall, though I treated myself to one of their turkey sandwiches and a pack of cookies, which unfortunately tasted as bland as I anticipated. Lately, almost everything I eat seems to have lost its flavor. But honestly, the bland food was the least of my worries today—I was more tired than usual. I don’t know if it’s from not getting much sleep lately or if things are catching up with me, but once the Benadryl kicked in, I was out.
Through my sleepy haze, I noticed Melissa beside me, both of us watching Ridiculousness and Catfish, which felt like the perfect lighthearted distractions. Melissa took on her usual role of VIP caregiver, delivering me—the “precious package”—safely home afterward. She’s been a true rock throughout this journey.
The rest of the day was for resting, but my mind didn’t rest as easily. I found myself reflecting on my life before cancer, where I am now, and what life might look like after this chapter. There’s this lingering question: “Do I change? And if I do, what changes?” Cancer has undoubtedly forced me to consider all the different things I am. I’m a woman, a mother, a daughter, a friend, an employee, a co-worker.
But it goes beyond that. I am resilient, learning to lean into hope even on my toughest days. I’m discovering an inner strength that I didn’t know I had, and my patience has been tested and redefined countless times. I’ve become an advocate—not just for myself but for anyone fighting their own battles, big or small. I’ve gained a deeper empathy, understanding the weight others might carry silently. And beyond this, I hope to be a voice of inspiration, showing others that it’s possible to face the darkest times with humor, courage, and grace.
So, who am I, and who will I be after cancer? I’m still figuring that out, but I do know that I’ll carry all of these parts forward. I’ll take this experience, and I’ll let it shape me, but not define me. I’ll emerge not just as a survivor but as someone who has lived fully through every twist and turn of this journey.
